


Becoming

by Novaturient



Series: The Grey Side [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Astral Projection, Backstory, Betrayal, Child Neglect, Comfort/Angst, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Kinda, Kylo Ren Backstory, Master/Servant, POV Snoke, Seduction to the Dark Side, Sharing a Body, Shippy Gen, Snoke actually cares about Ren but he's still kinda evil so idk, Snoke is less a dick but still kind of a dick, The Dark Side of the Force, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, Weird Fluff, snoke backstory, vaguely shippy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-31
Updated: 2018-04-12
Packaged: 2019-04-16 03:09:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 3,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14155353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Novaturient/pseuds/Novaturient
Summary: A series of short fics, following Snoke as he draws Kylo Ren to the dark side.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, & any kudos. :) Please keep in mind this is an AU, & there will be chapters ahead that hint at a "shippy" relationship. Turn back now if that's not your thing.

A tiny seed.

That’s all Ben Solo, grandson of Anakin Skywalker, was at the moment. A thought, a concept. Soon enough, he would grow, blooming into the world like a beautiful, savage flower. He couldn't make a mistake, not with this one; if Snoke's visions were right, this child would be just as important to the Force as his grandfather before him. He couldn't afford to fail, like he had with Darth Sidious so many ages ago. No... This would take time, and patience. 

Luckily, Snoke had plenty of both.


	2. Chapter 2

Ben's mother, surprisingly, was the one who took after Anakin the most between the twins.

There were times Organa stared right at him. Snoke didn’t know if she actually could see him; if she could, she never addressed him. She just locked her eyes on his, curling her arms a little tighter around her growing stomach. There was a fire there in her gaze, a fierce, wordless challenge. It wasn’t born from fear, but determination. Stubbornness. The princess-turned-rebel had no idea what she was protecting Ben from, but that was exactly what she was planning to do, even if it killed her. Snoke admired her resolve in the face of the unknown.

Unfortunately for her, Snoke had already won. She just didn’t know it yet.


	3. Chapter 3

It was when Ben was born, that she finally acknowledged him.

Solo had left the room, giving mother and child time to rest and bond. Organa held the small, quiet thing to her heart, eyes closed; Snoke watched over them both, making sure there were no unseen complications. For now, Ben needed his mother. It was in everyone’s interest to keep her alive.

“You won’t have him.”

Snoke glanced up at Organa, who once again was boring holes straight through him with her eyes. “You sound awfully confident,” he replied, though he had no idea if she could hear him.

If she heard, she didn’t flinch. “I don’t know what you are, or where you come from. I don’t care. You will not take him from me.”

He smiled. “I won’t have to.”

Organa blinked, looking away after a moment. She didn’t speak again.


	4. Chapter 4

Ben screamed.

“What’s wrong with him?” Solo asked as he rocked his son, the first time in weeks that he’d actually held the child. “Is that normal?”

Organa frowned. “No.”

No, Snoke agreed. Not for a normal child. But Ben wasn’t normal. Snoke could feel the Force move through the child, and for a moment, he felt regret. The dark side was a harsh mistress. It wanted Ben, needed him, and Snoke knew he was the only one who could be the teacher that Ben would require. But that power would come with a price, and this was the beginning of it. The world would always be too much for someone like Ben. At least until he learned to control it.

Solo had started singing to try and calm Ben. A dreadful sound.

Snoke reached out, gently brushing his fingers across Ben’s forehead. A reprieve, for now. Ben stopped his wailing, blinking up at Snoke with large, baby blue eyes. Somewhere in his chest, Snoke felt a small stab of affection; he brushed it away as quick as it had come. That... that wouldn’t do.

“He must like my singing,” Solo laughed.

Organa did not smile.


	5. Chapter 5

Watching Ben grow up was a test that Snoke hadn’t expected.

He had planned to persuade Ben to the dark side slowly, over time. He had already foreseen that it would happen, one way or another; what he hadn’t seen, at the time, was exactly how it would happen. Nor did he once ever suspect just how much it would, in turn, influence himself.

Organa tried to be a good mother. That much, Snoke could give her. But once she was recovered, she was barely home. When she was, she was attentive enough; still, there always seemed to be something just in the way between her and her son. A self fulfilling prophecy, Snoke thought to himself. He wasn’t doing anything to come between them, but Organa felt the darkness. And, despite her declaration long ago, her fear of that darkness would prove to be her undoing. She was pushing him away, slowly but surely, and she didn’t even realize it.

Solo, on the other hand, knew how distant he was becoming and didn’t seem too interested in fixing the problem. He, too, was absent more often than not. Snoke had nothing but contempt for the man. Ben tried so hard to fight for Solo’s attention, only to be brushed off more and more as time went by.

It was one of those times that Snoke realized something had changed. Ben was only two years old, standing in the doorway, staring after his father with tears in his eyes. He had never planned to get attached, not after Sidious. Love was a mistake, and loving an apprentice was even more of one, but anger flickered to life in his heart as he saw that little boy trying so hard to not cry. Because it wouldn’t do any good, would it? It never did, did it? He clenched his teeth, following Ben back to his bedroom.

It was there that Ben finally began to sob, curling upon himself like a wounded animal. Snoke watched a moment, fighting two contrary urges in himself. For two years, he had remained in the shadows, an unseen and unheard feeling and nothing more. But... everyone was keeping this boy at arm’s length. He was breaking. And that, that tugged at something Snoke hadn’t felt in ages. Frowning, he gave in to it and moved forward to where Ben lay in the floor, weeping.

“Shh,” Snoke whispered, curling around the child and stroking his hair. “It will be alright.”

Ben sniffled, leaning into Snoke’s embrace without question.

This, Snoke thought with more sadness than he’d expected, was going to be too easy.


	6. Chapter 6

The years passed, faster and faster as Ben aged.

Snoke was never far from his future student. Ben would get distressed if Snoke strayed too far, and Snoke couldn’t focus on much else, anyways; most of his time was devoted to Ben, and he found that he didn’t really mind the demand. Ever since Sidious had betrayed him, he had been alone. Maybe, he once pondered, that was the common ground between himself and Ben. Loneliness was an emotion most sentient beings felt. Even if they never wanted to admit it.

Ben was four years old, when he finally seemed to start getting curious about Snoke. At first, Snoke had been content to just be a presence in Ben's life, a quiet figure watching over him. But for the last two years, Snoke had slowly begun to open Ben’s mind to more. He allowed Ben to sense him, to hear him. Now... Now, Ben was peering at the spaces that Snoke occupied. He couldn’t see, not yet. But he knew. He said nothing to his mother, or anyone else. And, a week short of his fifth birthday, Ben finally spoke.

“Who are you?” he asked, hugging his pillow to his chest.

Snoke paused. “A friend.”

“A friend of mom and dad?”

“No,” he replied, softly. “Just your friend.”

Ben turned his eyes exactly to where Snoke stood in the room. “Good. I don’t want you to be their friend.”

Snoke laughed for the first time in a very long time.


	7. Chapter 7

He never had to tell Ben to keep their friendship a secret. Ben liked it that way.

The days were spent letting Ben read to him, improving his writing, helping him memorize math and history. When Ben became scared of the dark, Snoke taught him how to sense anything that could be waiting under his bed or in the closets. He wasn’t scared of the dark for long. When Ben had nightmares, Snoke was there to soothe him. He taught Ben how to look into the hearts and minds of those around him, giving him the ability to tell lies from truth. Ben grew to be a quiet, serious boy, with a strengthening confidence in himself and a sharp tongue that Snoke found endearing.

Snoke taught Ben the history of the Force, of the Sith and Jedi; it's not like either of his parents were planning to do so at any point, let alone soon enough for it to matter to a little boy who was aching for a sense of belonging. Ben ate up the information, wide eyed and eager for more, always. Tales of his grandfather were his favorite.

“He was a pilot, too? Like my dad?” Ben asked when he was nine.

Snoke smiled. “Better.”

Ben flopped down on his bed, staring up at the TIE fighter model he had hanging from his ceiling. “I want to be a pilot, someday. Do you think I will be?”

“I think you can be whatever you want to be.”

“At least someone does.”


	8. Chapter 8

Ben was twelve when Solo caught them speaking one night.

Normally, they were so careful. Any time Solo was home, they made sure to speak mind to mind; it was a trick Ben had learned when he was ten, and it became their favored mode of communication. They could sense each other in an instant, with emotion and meaning flowing between them seemlessly, and at times it was almost like they were one in body and mind. But for whatever reason, that night, they forgot themselves and Ben spoke out loud.

At the dinner table, Solo leaned back in his chair, exchanging a glance with Organa before looking back to Ben. “Who were you talking to in your room, Ben?”

Silence. Ben kept eating his food, not meeting Solo’s eyes.

“Ben. Answer me.”

“Myself,” Ben finally replied. “Why?”

“Your mother and I are just concerned—“

Snoke felt a flare of rage, and he couldn’t tell if it was Ben’s or his own. Either way, Ben set down his utensils, now looking at his father. “You don’t get to be concerned about me,” Ben said with steel in his voice. “If you were worried about me, you should have been here for the last twelve years.”

Organa frowned. “Ben, don’t talk to your father that way.”

“Oh, as if you’re not thinking the same thing every day, mother.” They said nothing, and Ben stood from the table. “I don’t owe you an explanation for anything. Either of you.”

Ben stormed out, heading outside and towards a tree he liked to sit in when he needed to calm down. Snoke followed, perching on the branch next to Ben. Ben stared up at the stars, his breathing fast and shallow. Reaching out, Snoke rested a hand on Ben’s shoulder; that was all it took for his emotions to flow freely. The young boy crumpled, leaning hard against Snoke and shaking.

“I’m sorry,” he whimpered into Snoke’s mind. “I didn’t mean to...”

“There’s nothing to apologize for, truly. It was a mistake.”

“I don’t... I don't want to disappoint you.”

“Oh, dear one.” Snoke felt the last of his walls crumble, and his voice softened. “You’ve _never_ been a disappointment.”

Ben buried his face into Snoke’s shoulder, and wept.


	9. Chapter 9

Ben was thirteen. It was late at night, and the weather was warm. They laid on the grass, watching the stars once more; Snoke was naming the constellations, describing all the planets. He pointed out where Alderaan, Organa’s planet, used to be. He told Ben the story of its destruction, at the hands of his own grandfather.

“How could someone blow up an entire planet? What about all the innocent people?” Ben wondered.

Snoke was silent for a time. “War is complicated,” he answered, his tone somber. “Sometimes things happen that you’d rather not happen. Sometimes you do things you don’t want to do, because it’s what people have decided is needed for the greater good. It’s nothing that should ever be done lightly, though. It is a serious, painful thing.”

Ben pursed his lips in thought. He sat up after a bit, looking towards Snoke. “Have you done things you didn’t want to do?”

“Of course.”

“Will I have to do things I won’t want to do?”

Turning his head, Snoke met Ben’s eyes. There was no fear there, no doubt. Just curiosity. “There may come a time I ask that of you. Do you think you will be able to?”

Ben didn’t even blink. “If you asked it of me, I would do anything.”

Snoke felt the universe shudder.

He was the one. He was absolutely the one.


	10. Chapter 10

Organa and Solo decided to send Ben away.

Packing only what was needed, Ben didn’t say goodbye to either of them. He stared straight ahead as they were transported to where Luke Skywalker was waiting. Ben was fourteen. Time had flown, and the shadow of childhood was fading. His voice was growing low, his body was lengthening and becoming stronger, and his brown eyes held a new, sharp glint to them. Ben was quickly growing from boy to man, and Snoke knew that casting him out was a grave mistake on the part of Organa and Solo. How could they not see it? Their son needed them now more than ever, as any young person would at such an age, when it was all too easy for them to get confused, rebellious, and lose their way.

Not that Snoke really cared about that last bit; the more that Ben turned away from his family, the more he turned towards the dark side. Towards Snoke. And really, Snoke only needed a little longer. Ben was already wavering. All that was needed was one breaking point, one more blow, and Ben would be ready to step into the role that had been readied for him.

And then, oh, how they would _all_ pay.


	11. Chapter 11

“Don’t call me Ben anymore.”

Snoke blinked at the request. It had been a year since they’d arrived. Luke, naturally, couldn't do a thing to prevent the inevitable. Being surrounded by Jedi on training only highlighted just how different Ben was to them. It only isolated him more. Ben was balancing on the thinnest of wires; every day, Snoke could see him slipping closer to the dark side. Still. Snoke hadn’t realized they’d arrived at this point so quickly. Did Ben really know what it meant, to reject his name? To walk away from the identity given to him by his parents? It didn't really matter, maybe, if he didn't yet. Snoke could see the resentment in the young man’s eyes every time he heard his birth name. Snoke could feel the pain it caused him, it be reminded of his family. 

Well... If he wanted a new identity, then he would have one.

“What should I call you, instead?”

“I am yours. You know me best." He looked to Snoke, cocking his head. “Tell me, then. Who am I?”

 _I am yours._ An unexpected declaration. Snoke paused, wondering how that was meant, but put it out of his mind and focused on the question instead. Humming, he considered all the words in all the languages he'd ever learned, before settling on one idea. “Kylo Ren. It means ‘sky ruler’.”

His student smiled. The irony wasn’t lost on him.

With any luck, he'd live up to it.


	12. Chapter 12

The next five years were spent building their future empire.

Kylo found a small group of Jedi who followed him without question. Snoke was setting up the board to become the Supreme Leader of the First Order. Everything was coming together, and now, all Snoke had to do was wait. Wait for Kylo’s anger and frustration to explode. Wait for Luke’s doubt and fear to be his own ruin. It wouldn’t be much longer; Kylo was isolated from all but a handful of the other young Jedi, and Luke was doing nothing to quell the storm coming on the horizon.

Twenty years old, Kylo had become fearsome to behold. Snoke admired his fighting form, offering critique from the side as Kylo practiced. Time had been kind to them both. Kylo was a warrior now, lean and toned into a graceful, deadly weapon. And Snoke, his body had continued healing, age and scars fading away as if the hands of time were sweeping backwards. His connection to Kylo had replenished his own power, somehow. All that was left was a deep scar down the side of his face, and that, his vanity could live with.

Kylo had never asked about it, before, but Snoke noticed Kylo eyeing him more closely as the years passed. It seemed inevitable that, someday, Kylo would get curious. As Kylo took a break from training, it seemed that day had arrived. He leaned against a tree, resting in the shade and staring at Snoke over his water canteen. After a moment, he tilted his head.

“Master...”

Snoke turned his attention to Kylo, feeling a familiar warmth at that word. “Yes?”

“I’m sorry if it’s out of line for me to ask.” Kylo hesitated. “If I may, how did you get your scar?”

It wasn’t out of line, but an unpleasant memory, all the same. Snoke sighed. “There was a time in my life when I carried a different name than I do, now. When I still believed in the duality of Jedi and Sith. I was a Sith Lord, and I had an apprentice known as Darth Sidious. I loved him, and taught him all that I knew. Including, theoretically, the technique I learned of how to cheat death.”

“He did this to you?”

“He did. Once he thought he got everything from me he could, he attacked me with Force lightning. I was gravely injured, and disfigured. It’s taken this long to recover.”

Kylo narrowed his eyes. “What happened to him?”

“He died.” Snoke shrugged. “Unfortunately for him, the technique I taught him was only to save other people. I never taught him the technique required for staying young and healthy. He withered, he grew weak, and he was murdered by his own apprentice, in turn.”

“Good. He was a fool.”

The venom in Kylo’s voice was surprising. Snoke went to speak, but suddenly, there was a sensation along his face; Kylo was using the Force to touch him, phantom fingers tracing along the scar. His breath caught in his chest. Oh... But then it was over, and Kylo was standing, heading back towards their temporary home without another word.

Snoke closed his eyes. Once the trembling in his body stopped, he went back to his work.


	13. Chapter 13

He had told himself he would never make the same mistake he’d made before; Snoke had been so very wrong.

And it was _that_ night, that he knew beyond a doubt how wrong he’d been. 

It was summer. It was storming outside, rain coming down in a flood. Snoke was curled through Kylo’s mind, entwined to the core. Kylo was nestled just as close, deep in a black, dreamless rest. Peaceful, or as close as either got to the feeling these days, anyways. Three years changed much, between them as well as in every other way. _I’m yours_ , Kylo had once told him; Snoke knew the reverse was equally true. He was devoted to the young man, enough that he had slowly begun to shift his goals over the years. When everything began, he’d accepted that in order to wipe out the Jedi and begin things over again, Kylo would just be a tool in that. But then...

Well. Someone once said, "to know is to love". As loathe as Snoke was to admit it, whoever said that had been right.

They were sleeping when it happened. Snoke startled awake when he felt it-- malicious intent slicing through the night. Directed at Kylo. He only had a split second to register Luke, lightsaber drawn. _No, no, not now, not like this._ He reached out, jolting Kylo from sleep just in time for Kylo to turn, activating his own lightsaber and blocking Luke’s strike.

The fragile wire Kylo balanced on snapped. He plunged into the darkness.

It was not at all what Snoke had imagined.

It was terrifying.


	14. Chapter 14

Kylo stood among the rubble, blood and smoke thick in the air. They were dead, all of them, except the few that Kylo has chosen to be his knights. Snoke stood at his side, staring at the slaughter with him and feeling his pulse race with the vicious feeling of revenge. It was horrifying. Horrifying and, Force's sake, delicious. After a moment, Kylo turned to Snoke, radiating fear, uncertainty, pain. Snoke reached out, stroking Kylo’s hair and sending back as much calm, assurance, and pride that he could muster.

“Stay,” Snoke said quietly, once Kylo had relaxed into his touch. “I’ll come get you.”

Turning his head, Kylo pressed his mouth to Snoke’s wrist. “Hurry.”

Snoke paused at the order. _Hurry._ That, he could finally do. He ran his thumb over Kylo’s lips, savoring the way that they parted just a little, then pulled his consciousness back into his physical body. Taking a moment to slow his heartbeat, Snoke sent out the order for the Supremacy to turn towards the would-have-been academy. He could feel Kylo’s energy growing closer, fragile, yet darker than anything Snoke had ever anticipated.

Twenty-three years of preparation. Twenty-three years of patiently waiting. 

Now, their real test would begin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, folks. :D Thank you for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos. If you enjoyed this work, check out the rest of the series, and keep an eye out for more to come.


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